Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Not Me Monday

Welcome to another fantastic addition of Not Me Monday, the day where we all get to be brutally honest about all we did not do during the week. I, for one, feel so much better getting this stuff off my chest, well, if I actually did do this stuff, which I did not. :) Enjoy!

I did not notice that my sweet one year old son had stolen his big sisters pb&j sandwich and wound up smearing grape jelly all over the couch and his body. I absolutely did not run for the camera instead of a towel. Of course the batteries were not completely dead. I then did not try to take batteries out of toys in order to get a picture of this lovely mess. With all of the work I put into this picture, it absolutely did not get deleted off of my camera. I did not wind up with grape jelly on my other couch, toys, books, and carpet because I was so adamant about getting a picture. I am not that obsessed with capturing EVERYTHING in photographs. One picture of this debacle is not more important than no stains on my brand new couches. Nope, not me!

I did not walk into my living room after doing dishes to find my son playing with toilet paper. I absolutely did not encourage my son to continue unrolling the toilet paper so that I could get a picture, see above "not me". We did not waist a brand new roll of toilet paper in the name of fun. I completely did not enjoy my time with my son and realize that toilet paper can be enjoyed in a whole new way. Who knew?!? That would be weird and embarrassing.

My sweet son, who will be 2 in March, absolutely did not lean to the side in his booster seat at the table and "let one rip" during dinner time. My husband would never have taught him this disgusting trick. His Mommy, Sister, and Daddy so did not laugh our heads off in shock at what he just did. Said sweet son did not let out a big sigh of relief after all the laughing was over to only induce more laughing. My sweet son did not think he was the funniest thing ever. We do not encourage this kind of behavior at the dinner table and it is only met with quick discipline and never laughing. I do not often feel as though I live in a zoo. And even if all of this did happen, I certainly wouldn't let anyone know about it. Sheeeeeshh!

During dinner Wednesday night, my beautiful family and I never sat at the table with the laptop on so we could watch live video of a police chase taking place in Los Angeles. Any form of technical entertainment is not allowed at dinner time because we love talking to each other and completely enjoy one another's company. We would also never subject our precious children to something that may have a possible violent outcome. Our children live in a complete bubble knowing nothing of evil. If we had watched this live video, we would not have all been standing around the computer as the criminal jumped out of the U-Haul. We would not have been yelling at the computer for the police to catch him/her. And since we were obviously not watching this video, we would not have stood there and debated if this was a man or a woman. My sweet beautiful daughter would not have said "Of course it's a woman because she has big boobies like mommy". I did not need to put that in quotes because you only put things in quotes that were actually said. I would not have joined in the laughter along with my family while my sweet daughter tried to convince me that I do have big boobies. Goodness, I love that child.

Finally, all that screaming you heard last night, well that was definitely not me losing my voice while screaming for the Steelers to win the Superbowl. I do not care about football nor do I scream at T.V.'s. I am a dignified quiet, traditional woman who spent her evening doing dishes, laundry, and taking care of my family's every need. Ha Ha! Yeah Right! I was probably the loudest one on the block. I think I have a cramp in my wrist from swinging the terrible towel so much. GOOOO STEELERS!!!! (Or as they say in Pittsburgh, Go Stillers!). I do not speak Pittsburgese (but I'm learning) :)




Leave me a comment and come back for my next blog on all the fun crafts I have been doing. So fun!!

4 comments:

Doublebanker said...

Glad the Steelers won...but was glad that Arizona made a game of it in the 2nd half. Hate the blowout superbowls!

My Not Me Monday post

Cat walking on water?

Julie said...

My throat hurt last night after screaming during the game too! I was glad the Steelers won!

Great post! I do the same thing...trying to capture everything on camera! It's hard not to see something & think "That's a great blog post!"

My son also turns 2 in March!

Rebecca said...

I absolutely love your Mondays. Can't wait to hear about the crafts your doing.

Deb said...

I've read every last word of your blogs. I laugh and cry right along with your everyday antics. It's great to be able to feel a little closer to you by reading them.
I figured the Steelers would win but thought it was GREAT when the Cardinals pulled ahead and gave them a real run for their money at the end. :-)